Blow Me!

by Bernardo (bernforever@moviegurus.com)
March 14, 2001

America's federal drug-enforcement budget in 1968: $60 Million
America's federal drug-enforcement budget in 1999: $17 Billion

Amount the government has spent in its 30-year "War on Drugs": $300 Billion
Amount of money generated by the drug trade in 1 year: $300 Billion

Cocaine seizures at the U.S./Mexico border, 1983: 20,000 lbs
Cocaine seizures at the U.S./Mexico border, 1997: 239,000 lbs

Largest drug bust in United States history: 6 Tons
Amount of cocaine that leaves Columbia annually: 700 Tons

Deaths from drug-induced causes, 1997: 15,973
Cocaine-related emergency room episodes, 1997: 161,087

Number of people who will read this article: 6 Number of people whom I will have already bored into hitting the "Back" button by this point: 4

The statistics are mind-blowing. The futility of the government's efforts: shocking. The proliferation of drugs and drug users: staggering. The lack of interest in my writing: not surprising. The United States government is throwing everything it has at the drug problem but for all its money and effort, the situation only seems to get worse as time goes by. How did the United States find itself in this situation? New Line Cinema wants to show you.

On April 6th, New Line is releasing "Blow" and if you're thinking (like I did), that this is a movie based on President Clinton's memoirs, prepare to be (as I was) disappointed (very, very disappointed). "Blow" is a blow-by-blow account of how one bloke became the ridiculously rich middleman between an unsuspecting America and the Columbian cartels with their devastatingly addictive, unbelievably lucrative product. No, not Starbucks coffee: cocaine.

The movie is based on the book "Blow: How a Small-Town Boy Made $100 Million with the Medellin Cocaine Cartel and Lost it All" by Bruce Porter. If you're planning on reading it and don't want to know how it turns out for Mr. Small-Town Boy, here's a suggestion: Don't read the title. Johnny Depp takes lead acting honors with Ray Liotta, Penelope Cruz and Paul Reubens lending support. Ray Liotta, of course, is famous for being a Goodfella and a Hannibal victim with a taste for sweetbreads; Penelope Cruz is famous for being Penelope Cruz; and Paul Reubens is infamous for not being able to keep Pee-Wee in his Playhouse, if you know what I mean.

The official premise goes like this:
"Blow" is a high-velocity look at George Jung's spectacular rise and fall - based on the true story of how powder cocaine turned into America's biggest drug problem and how one man from the blue-collar suburbs became the 35 billion-dollar a-year conduit to the Colombian cartels. Ted Demme (Monument Ave.) directs this riveting look at the manic allure - and dangerous reality - of a drug smuggler's everyday life, and unfolds one of the great untold stories from the recent annals of American crime and culture. (Quoted from the official site)

Sounds eenteresting (my attempt at a Mexican accent). "Blow" spans five decades, following George Jung from childhood innocence in the '50s to the dizzying heights of the '70s and finally, to the pitiful lows of the late '80s and '90s. George Jung was an All-American kid from Weymouth, Massachusetts who dropped out of college and got kicked out of the service for selling pot to his fellow soldiers. After moving to California in the early '70s and learning how to fly a plane, Jung began smuggling marijuana from Mexico one planeload at a time (700 pounds with a value of about $50,000). Eventually getting himself arrested, Jung found himself in a federal prison in Danbury, Connecticut, sharing a cell with a Colombian named Diego Delgado, who persuaded him to deal with a much more profitable drug. (Buying a kilo of cocaine in Colombia cost $4000. That same kilo sold for $60,000 in the United States. One small planeload netted about $20 Million.) On the outside, Delgado introduced Jung to Pablo Escobar (Cliff Curtis), the big daddy of the Medellin cartel who was making Bill Gates money before Bill Gates was making Bill Gates money. That introduction triggered an avalanche of the deadly, white powder and disco-dancing America got slammed full force with the addiction, corruption and destruction associated with cocaine and has been tumbling downhill ever since.

What makes this story so compelling is the fact that because of a few lucky occurrences (or rather, unlucky occurrences), a college-dropout-pothead manages to usher in an era of widespread cocaine use, wreaking havoc on an otherwise happily-stoned America and leaving behind a legacy of violence and crime and death and crack houses and homeless addicts and crack babies born of those addicts and the loss of billions and billions of taxpayer dollars. Watching this unfortunate fool's tale unfold should provide for an interesting two hours.

So next month, don't waste your time on whatever movie all those blowhard critics are blowing out of proportion. Take the money that you earn by blowing glass or selling blow-up dolls or serving blowfish, walk right up to the ticket booth and say, "Blow me! And my friend too!" And if security doesn't escort you out, prepare to be blown away by the mind-blowing tale of George Jung and the devastating blow he deals to the health and well being of the United States.

Blow.